Reasons why an ex may attempt to re-enter your life
There’s a chance that you’ve finally put the past behind you and are having the time of your life–and then your ex shows up. Strangely enough, regardless of whether we like it or not, ex-partners do this all the time– and it’s important not to jump to the conclusion that your ex wishes to reconcile with you.
Here are seven reasons why your ex may reappear months (or perhaps even years!) after you last saw him or her:
1. They’re looking for a way to boost their ego
Sadly, the knowledge that you’re still there, pining away for them (regardless of whether you are or are not) can also be the jumping-off point that they need to feel happy about themselves and feel better about themselves.
2. They are looking for someone to cry on.
When you’re out in the cold, dark world of dating, it’s difficult to find good emotional support. If you have a strong friendship that supports the caring side of your relationship, your partner may believe that you are still a safe haven for them to fall when things get tough.
Unfortunately, when people show up in this manner and vent about their troubles to you before disappearing again, it only leads to resentment and emotional stress for you and others around them. We don’t often consider emotional labor to be “work,” but it is, in fact, a form of labor. Consider whether your ex-partner has a legal right to this type of work from you.
Read also signs he still loves you after breakup
3. They retaliated, the situation fizzled out, and the whole experience left them missing you.
Especially if your relationship has been going on for a long period of time, it can be very easy to get caught up in fantasizing about how wonderful dating will be once the relationship ends. Because the grass appears to be greener on the other side, your ex ventures out into the wild dating world in search of… someone who has quirks, hangups, and is normally human— just like you are.
This is especially common among ex-partners who feel suffocated in the relationship and as if they were lacking something else by being around you. Before yours, they had a relationship that didn’t work out, and now they know that the picture they had of what it would be like to be with someone else isn’t what it seems like. As a result, they return with their tails between their legs, prepared to renegotiate their relationship with you.
4. They have an erroneous belief that they want to be friends with you.
The cliche “let’s be friends” is still alive and well, despite its unfortunate history. And for those who aren’t just trying to keep their cool while their ex sobs in their presence, it can be extremely difficult to say “no” to an ex who approaches them in a friendly manner. This is especially true if you had a genuine friendship at the heart of your relationship.
5. They’ve changed, and they’re interested in learning if you have.
To be honest, seeing your ex having a good time after your breakup isn’t something anyone wants to see. It’s not so much that individuals want their ex to suffer as it is that they may experience a sick ego boost when trying to compare their own progress after your relationship breakdown to their own progress. This, like a lot of the other explanations on this list, could be completely unintentional. It’s possible that they saw something on social networking sites and became obsessed with you and couldn’t stop thinking about you. It’s possible that you were brought up in conversation by chance by someone in their life.
Furthermore, if you had remediable issues in your relationship that they failed to resolve while you were together, they may have changed their perception of themselves and appear in an attempt to impress you or win you back.
6. They Are Interested in Sex.
Ex sex, how I love thee. As if you and your partner needed another reason to become even more chemically attached to one another.
7. They truly, completely, and utterly desire your return.
Sometimes, after a period of time apart, your ex begins to realize what they were missing out on when they ended your relationship. Even if it doesn’t appear to be the case on the surface, they may be sincere in their desire to reconnect with you and get back together.
Reasons why an ex may attempt to re-enter your life by Mark Steve